Integrating your finances with happiness and well-being should be easy. But for many people, it’s anything but that.
And when it comes to retirement, the angst about tapping into savings is real for retirees who cling tightly to their money for fear they will outlive it.
In his new book, “Wealth in the Key of Life: Finding Your Financial Harmony,” Preston D. Cherry, a certified financial planner, takes a crack at showing smart ways to navigate the emotional and psychological aspects mixed up in financial planning.
Cherry offered insights and advice in a conversation with Yahoo Finance. Here are edited highlights of that conversation:
Kerry Hannon: Why does money create such an emotional mess for some people?
Preston Cherry: It’s because we exchange ourselves for money. We work for it. We’re exchanging a part of our being every day in order to earn income. Because you’re giving a part of yourself every day, that transaction gives money soul. It’s a soulful exchange. Your identity is in the money that’s in your bank account.
How do we get unstuck when it comes to dealing with our financial lives?
It’s about giving oneself permission. To start the unstuck process, you need to ask the questions: Where are you on your journey? Where are you with your career or your business? Where are you internally? Do you know what you don’t want to do anymore? What is it that you do want to do? Are you healthy?
Can you elaborate on the importance of reflecting on how we spend our money?
You need to be able to do this reflection without shame or judgment and push back on societal norms and stigmas. Heaven forbid you want to go buy a new car. My wife and I are looking at buying a Cadillac Escalade. The price of a 2025 Cadillac Escalade starts [at] around $90,000. That’s a choice and a preference. We have the capacity to do that. Our savings rate is being met. And there’s nothing wrong with that. We don’t owe our explanation to anyone. We give ourselves the permission to do that.
This is a book of permissions to live your life how you choose, providing that you have a financial plan. If someone makes you feel ashamed of spending your money a certain way, you need to say MYOB, which is mind your own business.
Read more: 5 psychological money hacks to cut spending and increase savings
How is money our partner?
Money is not just a tool. It’s your partner. You dance with a partner. A partner is fluid. Your relationship has flexibility. It adjusts. It has a soul. I call it the humanity of money. You give yourself permission to earn the resources that you need in order to allocate that money for your preferences and your purpose.
How is your financial plan your life plan?
It is a life plan because your financial plan always comes down to life-money balancing. It’s a teeter-totter. Both of those things are in movement. So it’s balancing and living in a way that gives you wealth and well-being together. That’s how you prosper.
What are some of the biggest regrets your retiree clients have when they retire?
One regret is ‘I wish I had started saving earlier.’
The other one is that they regret not preparing emotionally and having a plan for the transition to retirement. These are having answers to questions such as: What am I going to do next? How am I going to do it? How am I going to reacclimate myself into hobbies and know myself?
They regret that it took them so long to give themselves permission to retire, and then to unplug from an identity that they may be used to — whether it be their business or corporate job.
Some of them regret ruining their finances supporting adult children.
And, finally, they regret being too tight with their money when they were in their 60s and first retired, when they had vitality. It’s that sticky issue of not starting sooner to give themselves permission to withdraw and use their money. They had trouble realizing that they had saved enough. and they had saved well.
Read more: How much money should I have saved by 50?
Parting thoughts?
Give yourself grace in order to get where you want to go. You’ve got to give yourself permission to live your full life now and not only in retirement. At 70, you might not be able to enjoy those things you would have when you were younger and had that vitality.
Kerry Hannon is a Senior Columnist at Yahoo Finance. She is a career and retirement strategist, and the author of 14 books, including “In Control at 50+: How to Succeed in The New World of Work” and “Never Too Old To Get Rich.” Follow her on Bluesky.
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